Today we are diving into topics that I’m probably gonna get a lot of hate over. But let’s be real, being gender nonconforming, I’m gonna be hated either way, so might as well make it worth my while!

The superiority of woman spaces

One of the biggest things that frustrates me and a lot of the other gender nonconforming people I know is the superiority of woman spaces.

I see this happen all the time, especially when I promote my services as a cycle coach for gender nonconforming AFABs. I have women telling me that I am taking away from their womanhood or that I am taking away from their experience.

1. Knowledge about the AFAB body and how it works doesn’t only apply to women…
2. Gender nonconforming people exist – that is just fact and we are worthy of having our own spaces.
3. If you are looking for women focused support – ITS OUT THERE. If you can’t find it – then CREATE it.

If you need recommendations on where to go to find a woman focused space – I am happy to direct you to so many amazing people I have in my life.

This is bigger than just “women’s” rights

We (gender nonconforming people) are left out of all of the conversations.

“We’re fighting for women’s rights.”

I’m sorry, whose rights?

In that statement alone you are leaving out and excluding so many people! It should be AFAB rights (assigned female at birth) rights, because there are many people who are assigned the sex female at birth who don’t identify as women as a woman.

That is just a fact. We exist, we’re allowed to exist. We are allowed to take up space and these rights impact us tremendously.

But instead we sit there and bitch and fight about how “you can’t be in women’s spaces” and “you can’t be in women’s spaces” and “your existence challenges my identity,” because being gender nonconforming makes you look at your own gender identity and sometimes it feels uncomfortable.

Especially when you start unpacking all of the racist, supremacist, and colonizer ideologies that we are raised to believe from a young age.

It is literally ingrained in the way our society functions. There’s no way around it. And if you’re a gender nonconforming, you are challenging that system.

People are waking the f*ck up

That’s why people are getting scared, because gender nonconforming people just people in general are starting to wake the fuck up and we see what they’re doing to us. We see what the beliefs we’ve been raised to follow are doing to us, and we see the divides that it’s causing.

We’re not taking this shit anymore.

Tune in for the full conversation! Sending you love, my friend <3

Alyssa Lilly

P.S. If you are an AFAB looking to vanquish your cycle pain in an inclusive environment, check out my free to day mini-course designed with you in mind. It’s time to throw out all the bullsh*t “go take a Midol and suck it up” answers and to actually figure out what is going on with your body and how to vanquish your pain. Sign up here: ⁠https://courageousembodiment.com/register⁠

You can find all of my links, socials and website here: ⁠https://shor.by/AlyssaLilly

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PODCAST and BLOG disclaimer: While I make every effort to broadcast correct information, I am still learning.  I will double check all my facts but realize that research and methods are a constantly changing science and art.  One coach or professional may have a different way of doing things from another.  I am simply presenting my views that will be as evidence based as possible. I welcome any comments, suggestions, or correction of errors. By listening to this podcast or reading this blog, you agree not to use this podcast or blog as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others. Consult your own physician for any medical issues that you may be having. This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast or blog.  Under no circumstances shall Alyssa Durham, Beautiful and Courageous LLC, any guests or contributors to the podcast or blog, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of Beautiful and Courageous LLC be responsible for damages arising from use of the podcast or blog.

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